Only in the Bush Administration...

would this kind of denial be necessary, much less this kind of accusation be non-farcical. It is depressing that we have sunk so low as this.

Worst of all, its abundantly clear VP Cheney 1) knew what he was saying, 2) meant what he was saying, and 3) WAS talking explicitly about waterboarding. The fact that Tony Snow's denial amounts to "Only an idiot would say this, and VP Cheney is not an idiot, therefore he did not say it" is pathetic.

This has moved beyond politics, these people just have no common decency.

How the Bush Administration is Destroying America's Stature in the World

To put is succinctly, by throwing us off the moral high ground like a bunch of kids sledding down a wintry hillside. Instead of being a source of inspiration for human rights advocates around the world, the United States now finds itself the excuse for torture and mistreatment by the World's unsavory leaders. How lowly we have become. I can only hope that November, and Novembers to come, will provide us with hope for our future. We must strive, and succeed, in removing the tarnish to our status as a beacon of liberty, democracy, and human rights in this new century. Otherwise, the sacrifices of the Greatest Generation, the Founding Generation, and others who proved the worth of this Great Experiment will have been in vain.

This is weak...

Banning tag from playgrounds because its too rough? Are you kidding? What are we turning our kids into with policies like these? Why don't we just put them in hamster bubbles until they are 18?

And using a "legal" excuse? That's just crap. They either made no attempt to get legal advice and are scared of their own shadows, or are getting horrible legal advice. No court is going to hold a school liable for a tag accident. Unless, of course, the teachers allow something crazy like playing tag with hammers or kitchen knives, or playing tag on a playground made of broken glass or jagged rocks. This is pathetic.

The Art of the Mea Culpa (but not really)

This was written by a family friend who freelances humorous commentaries for newspapers in the US and Canada:


“Apology 101: Don't accept any actual responsibility”
By David Martin
The Chicago Tribune
Published October 5, 2006

Good morning class, and welcome to "The Art of the Public Apology." Whether you're a famous public figure or a lowly civil servant, I'm going to teach you how to apologize without taking any actual responsibility for your actions.

First off, never ever accept blame or admit that you were wrong. After all, you're not sorry for what you've done or said; you're just sorry that you got caught.

True masters of the art admit no wrong and apologize for nothing, no matter how egregious the error. But let's face it; unless you're a billionaire or George W. Bush, this is not a realistic option for most of us.

All right, so you've done or said something that's gotten you into hot water. What do you do next? The classic opening gambit is to use apology-sounding words while avoiding any acknowledgement of culpability. The preferred wording is: "I am sorry if my words offended anyone."

Used by everyone from politicians to popes, this approach often does the trick. People hear the words "I'm sorry" and immediately assume what follows is an apology.

Yet you're not taking back what you did or disavowing your words. All you're really saying is that it's unfortunate that some people are thin-skinned. With any luck, this sneaky pseudo-

apology will get everyone off your back.

If you still meet some resistance, try some variations on the same theme. As in, "I'm sorry that people misinterpreted what I said" or "I wish my words had not caused so much pain."

Usually this approach will get you off the hook. Even if, like Pope Benedict XVI, you have to keep rephrasing your non-apology for a couple of weeks, eventually it will be accepted as a true mea culpa.

But sometimes saying you're sorry that people were offended is not enough. That's when you have to try the full-fledged non-apology apology.

With this method you say how truly, truly sorry you are and offer your sincere, heartfelt regrets. To most people, your statement will seem like the real thing.

But, like Royal Canadian Mounted Police Commissioner Giuliano Zaccardelli apologizing for Maher Arar's year of torture in a Syrian prison, be careful to use contingent phrasing. You can be as pained and as sorry as you want. You can even use words like error and mistake, but only contingently. As in, "I'm deeply sorry for any mistakes that might have been made that may have contributed to the problem that everyone's upset about." But whatever you do, don't point out that the wrongdoers under your command have gone unpunished, undisciplined or possibly on to a nice, lucrative promotion or a Presidential Medal of Freedom.

Finally, if all else fails, check into rehab. Sure, you may have slighted an entire race, nationality or religion. But remember, it was the drugs, alcohol or personality disorder doing the talking, not you.

Mel Gibson doesn't hate Jews; only alcoholic Mel hates Jews. Former House Rep. Mark Foley doesn't stalk teenage congressional pages; only substance abuser Mark Foley lusts after boys.

Check into the Betty Ford Clinic or, if you're on a tight budget, start attending Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Sex Addicts Anonymous or even All Addictions Anonymous meetings. Guaranteed you won't have to apologize at all. After all, in this modern age, being guilty means never having to say you're sorry.

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David Martin lives in Canada.

Giving the South a bad name...again.

I feel bad for most of Georgia, and the South (including South Carolina, where my family is), when crap like this happens. Its nitwits like this that keep the rest of the country thinking that the South is a backwards, irrational bunch of Bosephuses (Bosephii?) with 4th grade educations. Its not that I don't get frustrated and annoyed with the reality of the New South, but things like this make folks think its still 1874 (or in this case 1674) down there. I can only assume that some part of the Religious Right is also shaking their collective head in despair at the prospect of being inevitably lumped in with these jokers at some point.

Harry Potter indoctrinating our children into Wicca? Seriously? Kids in a Christian (or other) home are going to be led astray by Hermione Granger and the Weasleys? Not to mention the complete lack of religion and religious symbolism related to magic in the books. Magic is treated like native intelligence: something to be developed, enhanced, and perfected through education and practice. The school is more like a big "gifted and talented" program than anything. Magic is seen as something that can be used for good or evil (as can intelligence), and the books teach that using it for good is, well, good. And if my analogy holds, and magic is Rowling's proxy for intelligence, then Mr. and Mrs. Mallory truly are Muggles.

Even that might be an overanalysis. They're just good kids books (and I would argue, just good books). Diatribe over.

Oh SNAP!

So would you still hang a spoon on the door?

The Student Senate of the College of William and Mary has requested that the school's administration adopt a 'gender-blind' housing option, allowing co-ed dorm rooms. Proponents argue the policy change would help avoid uncomfortable situations caused by gay and straight same-sex roommates.

In other W&M news, the Senate also passed the Defense of Nightlife Act, in the hopes of thwarting the takeover by the Starbucks Corporation of the property currently held by the College Delly. Citing the need for more nightlife options in Williamsburg, Senator Zach Pilchen also noted that Starbucks "generally sucks".